Case #315585
Location: Dome Arena, Henrietta, New York
Time: 7:07-9:07pm

The Utica City Football Club has been charged with First Degree Murder within the game of indoor soccer after completely dismembering the Rochester Lancers 9-1 Friday evening. There are several culprits and accomplices within this murder charge.

Culprit #1: Moises Gonzalez 

Leading the UCFC attack on the Lancers was the newly arrived former Rio Grande Valley Barracuda. He had a total of four goals on the night, including the opening goal in the first quarter, a beautiful header goal in the second quarter and an absolute golazo in the third quarter. His performance took me back to when he was with the organization back in Syracuse and how he has such a natural goal scoring ability. 

Culprit #2: Momo

Momo is no stranger to the Lancers organization. He played for the Lancers in the National Premier Soccer League for a couple summers and had motivation to make a statement to his former teammates. He would tally two goals in the victory, thoroughly reminding the Rochester crew what they once had, at least on the outdoor pitch. 

Culprit #3: Andrew Coughlin

It’s very obvious a brick wall was involved in this crime. Coughlin had himself a night in the UCFC, stopping 17 of 18 shots and making the Lancers offense look completely absent from the match. He has hit his stride early and I am confident he won’t be slowing up any time soon. 

Other Notable Culprits:

Nate Bourdeau (2 Assists)
Bo Jelovac (1 Goal, 1 Assist)
Ricardo Diegues (1 Goal)
Cristhian Segura (1 Goal, 2 Assists)

It is obvious that this Lancers team is going to go through a learning curve this season as they transition from M2 to the MASL. The players were overmatched by the mighty UCFC squad and simply couldn’t compete with the experience Utica brought to the match. 

UCFC, on the flip side, looked like a well oiled machine with all the momentum on their side coming off a huge win against the Baltimore Blast last weekend. They have a home match against the Harrisburg Heat coming up next Sunday, where they will look to pull out to the top of the Eastern Conference with another victory. 

Verdict: UCFC found guilty, awarded victory.